The Many Forms of Love

I got this email from my Padrino a few weeks ago, and I just loved it so much I wanted to post it.

"I’ve always admired the Greeks for their perspective on life.  They had several words for love…we have just one.  Read these and tell me what you think.  These definitions came from Wikipedia…
Agape (ἀγάπη agápē) It generally refers to a "pure," ideal type of love, rather than the physical attraction suggested by eros. It has also been translated as "love of the soul."
- Eros (from the Greek deity Eros) is passionate love, with sensual desire and longing. The Greek word erota means in love. Although eros is initially felt for a person, with contemplation it becomes an appreciation of the beauty within that person, or even becomes appreciation of beauty itself. Eros helps the soul recall knowledge of beauty and contributes to an understanding of spiritual truth. Lovers and philosophers are all inspired to seek truth by eros.

- Philia, a dispassionate virtuous love, was a concept developed by Aristotle. It includes loyalty to friends, family, and community, and requires virtue, equality, and familiarity. Philia is motivated by practical reasons; one or both of the parties benefit from the relationship. It can also mean "love of the mind."
Storge (στοργή storgē) is natural affection, like that felt by parents for offspring.
- Xenia, hospitality, was an extremely important practice in Ancient Greece. It was an almost ritualized friendship formed between a host and his guest, who could previously have been strangers. The host fed and provided quarters for the guest, who was expected to repay only with gratitude.

You and [insert signifact other's name here] define what you have between one another… Either consciously or not.  (With the help of Ochun)…My fear that he may be a repeat of the past isn’t a reflection on him or you as a person.  What I mean is that without a change of perspective now, as compared to your perspectives in the past, history will repeat itself.  You’ve already started on that change…and you are highly conscious of it.  Don’t ever make the mistake in thinking you are “incapable” or “unlovable” or dysfunctional.  If you want it to last - and to be an enduring thing, it takes work on both your parts.  That sounds cheesy I know, but it’s true.
Most relationships start off as ‘eros’…this is natural…but it also fades.  That is almost a guarantee.  Being with someone, living with them or not…eventually problems will arise.  That’s just who we are as humans.  And that first word or act that is interpreted as being hurtful, either rightly or wrongly, sows the seeds of discord between two lovers.  Some spring back, some don’t.  Conscious living requires that we stop and evaluate these things…rather than solely reacting to them.  Oftentimes, we react and build a tiny bit of resentment…and a failure in communication allows that resentment to grow.
My view is this, Primera.  Find someone who you get along with…I mean REALLY get along with.  Let the basis for the relationship be genuine caring and friendship.  I hope that person is [insert significant others name here] for you.  Attraction is the means by which two people are brought together, Ochun is the queen of this.  But it is a poor foundation for a relationship. There must be a real connection and real caring.  It’s only through these things that you can weather through the difficulties that lie ahead…difficulties either inside or coming from outside the relationship. It takes effort to maintain these things.  You both have to want it.  Most couples have trouble because once the eros phase fades, they fail to maintain that connection…or to reestablish it once its lost.
I’m glad you have felt more at peace lately…if that’s due to me, then I’m even happier.  It is a blessing that we met.  You have helped me immeasurably but I doubt you may know to what extent.  I understand having difficulty with commitment…after 11 years of marriage turned to dust.  I don’t have any easy answers…just don’t rush it.  Communicate…always talk…and if he can’t meet you at least part way, then it’s time to reevaluate things.
I’ve known true love, just once…and it was the most powerful and encompassing thing I’ve ever experienced.  It was agape through and through…I’ll never forget it.  And in the moment I would have sacrificed everything and everyone in my life for it…and almost did.  Thank god I didn’t…and I pray to God that I never find myself in that place again.  It was a lesson, pure and simple.  A lesson in what my life is about…and a lesson that some things in life just aren’t meant for me to have.  I have a different purpose."

The Greeks had so many different forms of love - why do we constantly only search for one?! Thrive in all.